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AU of the AU of the AU
"This is all your fault Dean. You leave your car keys lying around on the kitchen table after I tell you that they both lost their car privileges." Maron was angry. She was seven months pregnant, again, and just had the police drop Natasha and Clint off.
Dean and Yukimi weren't listening at all, they were both inspecting Dean's baby for scratches or any other sign of damage that could have happened when two sixteen year old wizards sneak out with a badass car. "Damn it, I said sorry six times already. Do I need it to say it a seventh time to match your pregnancy month and how many kids you actually have?"
"Hey, we don't have seven kids. We have five." Yukimi hit Dean's arm and gave him a glare. Dean's mistake would cost him a night in the dog house if he wasn't careful. He didn't want to spend the night in the tree house since the couch was occupied by two cats and a dog.
This had all started when Natasha and Clint had gone out to a party the night before. It was the usual rules, be back by midnight and come back together. The usual rules went out the door somewhere along the night and Clint came back by himself at 4 am covered in mud, slamming every door he went through. Natasha showed up after 5am, also covered in mud, followed by Tony Stark, asking where his waffle payment was for picking up Natasha in the middle of nowhere.
A shouting match ensued between Clint, Natasha, Maron and Yukimi while Tony and Dean sat at the kitchen table, eating blueberry waffles and making side commentary on who would win which fight. Needless to say, Clint and Natasha were grounded from going out by themselves unless it was to take any of the younger children anywhere if the adults couldn't, excluding Dean since he doesn't count as an adult.
The next night, Dean had left his keys on the counter after coming back from a burger place, just in time for a game on tv that he and Yukimi had planned on watching. Maron was out for a walk with Yoite and Siobhan, and the younger kids were already in bed. So when Clint and Natasha saw the keys just laying on the table, they decided to finish what they had started the other night.
Four hours later, the police brought back Clint and Natasha, covered in mud, bruises and blood. None of which was on the car luckily; they liked Dean after all, he knew that some times kids needed to go do stupid stuff. Keeping the car safe was their insurance on keeping stupid stuff a secret. They just hoped that the inside of the trunk looked fine.
The police certainly didn't notice it, but the three adults heard the thumping from the trunk. Dean opened it slowly and peaked in, and shut it again, trying not to laugh. Maron pushed him aside and opened it fully to see a teenage boy tied up with duct tape on his mouth.
"Doesn't this remind you of Thobari?" Yukimi laughed as he ripped the tape off the kids mouth quickly, remembering when he and Dean tossed him in the trunk and drove for three hours to a football match.
The boy spewed some curse words as Maron yelled at the house, where Natasha and Clint were watching from a window, pleased as punch about their hard work. "Tell that ass that we catch that ass screwing around again, we'll make sure the police find him." Natasha shouted as she opened the window, ignoring everything Maron said.
Dean and Yukimi gave the boy a look that made him fidget as he worked on getting himself untied. "I heard ya the first time when that bastard knocked me out." he shouted back and glared at Clint who gave a condescending wave.
"I don't want to know what you did to piss our kids off, but you obviously deserved it so just get out of here and go back home." Maron snapped as she went back inside, rubbing her eyes in the process.
Yukimi shot Clint and Natasha a look that said they had to clean out the Impala's trunk first thing in the morning. Once Maron was far away enough, he gave them an 'Alright, you guys won!' look. High fives would come later though, after the lecture.
Once the cats and dog were cleared off the couch and towels were put down for the two mud monsters to sit down on, Maron just looked at them with her best mom face and waited for an explanation.
"It's all because Clint is a jealous prat that this happened. If he hadn't over reacted, I wouldn't have had to deal with that other asshole."
"Maybe you shouldn't flirt with guys who are total douchebags."
"I guess I'll never speak to you again if that's the case."
"Jesus, it's you two all over again" Dean muttered under his breath with a grin.
"She dressed like a tart and I called her on it so she goes and starts chatting up assholes like him."
"If I didn't we wouldn't have noticed him slipping things in to girls drinks. I told Clint and we decided it was our civic duty to do the right thing and kick that guys ass."
"We just got separated along the way last night and finished up business tonight."
The two and a half adults in the room just stared at the mud covered Clint and Natasha for a moment before Dean brought up a point that he thought was valid. "Next time, don't use my car for kidnapping. Steal one, but wear gloves."
Maron erupted and Yukimi tried to calm her down as her and Dean started to argue. They forgot about the two teenagers sitting on the couch and didn't notice them go up stairs to go get cleaned off and go to bed.
Dean and Yukimi weren't listening at all, they were both inspecting Dean's baby for scratches or any other sign of damage that could have happened when two sixteen year old wizards sneak out with a badass car. "Damn it, I said sorry six times already. Do I need it to say it a seventh time to match your pregnancy month and how many kids you actually have?"
"Hey, we don't have seven kids. We have five." Yukimi hit Dean's arm and gave him a glare. Dean's mistake would cost him a night in the dog house if he wasn't careful. He didn't want to spend the night in the tree house since the couch was occupied by two cats and a dog.
This had all started when Natasha and Clint had gone out to a party the night before. It was the usual rules, be back by midnight and come back together. The usual rules went out the door somewhere along the night and Clint came back by himself at 4 am covered in mud, slamming every door he went through. Natasha showed up after 5am, also covered in mud, followed by Tony Stark, asking where his waffle payment was for picking up Natasha in the middle of nowhere.
A shouting match ensued between Clint, Natasha, Maron and Yukimi while Tony and Dean sat at the kitchen table, eating blueberry waffles and making side commentary on who would win which fight. Needless to say, Clint and Natasha were grounded from going out by themselves unless it was to take any of the younger children anywhere if the adults couldn't, excluding Dean since he doesn't count as an adult.
The next night, Dean had left his keys on the counter after coming back from a burger place, just in time for a game on tv that he and Yukimi had planned on watching. Maron was out for a walk with Yoite and Siobhan, and the younger kids were already in bed. So when Clint and Natasha saw the keys just laying on the table, they decided to finish what they had started the other night.
Four hours later, the police brought back Clint and Natasha, covered in mud, bruises and blood. None of which was on the car luckily; they liked Dean after all, he knew that some times kids needed to go do stupid stuff. Keeping the car safe was their insurance on keeping stupid stuff a secret. They just hoped that the inside of the trunk looked fine.
The police certainly didn't notice it, but the three adults heard the thumping from the trunk. Dean opened it slowly and peaked in, and shut it again, trying not to laugh. Maron pushed him aside and opened it fully to see a teenage boy tied up with duct tape on his mouth.
"Doesn't this remind you of Thobari?" Yukimi laughed as he ripped the tape off the kids mouth quickly, remembering when he and Dean tossed him in the trunk and drove for three hours to a football match.
The boy spewed some curse words as Maron yelled at the house, where Natasha and Clint were watching from a window, pleased as punch about their hard work. "Tell that ass that we catch that ass screwing around again, we'll make sure the police find him." Natasha shouted as she opened the window, ignoring everything Maron said.
Dean and Yukimi gave the boy a look that made him fidget as he worked on getting himself untied. "I heard ya the first time when that bastard knocked me out." he shouted back and glared at Clint who gave a condescending wave.
"I don't want to know what you did to piss our kids off, but you obviously deserved it so just get out of here and go back home." Maron snapped as she went back inside, rubbing her eyes in the process.
Yukimi shot Clint and Natasha a look that said they had to clean out the Impala's trunk first thing in the morning. Once Maron was far away enough, he gave them an 'Alright, you guys won!' look. High fives would come later though, after the lecture.
Once the cats and dog were cleared off the couch and towels were put down for the two mud monsters to sit down on, Maron just looked at them with her best mom face and waited for an explanation.
"It's all because Clint is a jealous prat that this happened. If he hadn't over reacted, I wouldn't have had to deal with that other asshole."
"Maybe you shouldn't flirt with guys who are total douchebags."
"I guess I'll never speak to you again if that's the case."
"Jesus, it's you two all over again" Dean muttered under his breath with a grin.
"She dressed like a tart and I called her on it so she goes and starts chatting up assholes like him."
"If I didn't we wouldn't have noticed him slipping things in to girls drinks. I told Clint and we decided it was our civic duty to do the right thing and kick that guys ass."
"We just got separated along the way last night and finished up business tonight."
The two and a half adults in the room just stared at the mud covered Clint and Natasha for a moment before Dean brought up a point that he thought was valid. "Next time, don't use my car for kidnapping. Steal one, but wear gloves."
Maron erupted and Yukimi tried to calm her down as her and Dean started to argue. They forgot about the two teenagers sitting on the couch and didn't notice them go up stairs to go get cleaned off and go to bed.